Glory Baby

Sadly, I had a miscarriage this past February. That baby would have been due this Friday. We were so devastated as our plans to move to China included hoping that we would move over with a newborn...well, here we are, 2 months into this gig, and our arms (and my womb) are still empty. It has been a lonely time for me, especially as I look at how I hoped life would look like here, and am faced with the reality that it's not what I wanted or hoped for. I miss that sweet little one every day and am so thankful I got to carry him/her for the few weeks that I did. This month has been especially hard as our hope was to be pregnant by the due date so that we would not have to watch it pass still longing for another baby. But, alas, we are still longing and still trying to hope. Not that another baby would ever replace the one we had....no, far from that.

And while I'm still so very sad that we had to lose a precious life, I am grateful that that baby is whole and with Jesus. That sweet baby has 4 cousins, 7 great grandparents, and a dear, dear uncle fighting to hold him/her in Heaven, and I smile and cry at the same time thinking of it.

I am posting the lyrics to a song that I listened to a million times in college, but never actually heard the words, or understood their meaning. However, since our loss, I have listened to it a million more times, and it has given lots of comfort, along with lots of tears.

To my Glory Baby, you will always be a part of our family and we will never forget how you changed our lives. I miss you everyday, and I can't wait to hold you.

Love,

Mommy

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Glory Baby, You slipped away

As fast as we could say baby, baby
You were growing, what happened Dear,
You disappeared on us baby, baby
Heaven will hold you before we do
Heaven will keep you safe
Until we're home with you
Until we're home with you

(chorus)
We miss you everyday
Miss you in every way
But we know there's a day
When we will hold you, we will hold you
And you'll kiss our tears away
When we're home to stay
We can't wait for the day
When we will see you, we will see you
But baby let sweet Jesus hold you
‘Til mom and dad can hold you
You'll just have heaven before we do
You'll just have heaven before we do

Sweet little baby, it's hard to understand it
Cause we are hurting, we are hurting
But there is healing
And we know we're stronger people
Through the growing and in knowing
All things work together for our good
And God works his purposes
Just like he said he would
Just like he said he would

(chorus)

I can't imagine Heaven's lullabies
And what they must sound like
But I will rest in knowing
Heaven is your home
And it's all you'll ever know
All you'll ever know

(chorus)